Alabama's finest...er, dumbest- Sen. Cornpone Q. Chickenshit
America's Dumbest Senator, Tommy Tuberville (R-AL), continues to prove why he deserves the crown
Something reduces the speed of the world and that something is stupidity! Stupidity is a boring friction!
Mehmet Murat ildan
Arrogance is blind to the stumbling block.
Toba Beta, Master of Stupidity
I’ve run out of ways to describe Sen. Tommy Tuberville's world-class arrogance and immense stupidity (R-AL). Somehow, he was able to cobble together a career as a reasonably successful major college football coach, though I have no idea how he might have pulled that off. The junior Senator from the Yellowhammer State has the intellectual agility of a box of Pop-Tarts. Worse, he believes he’s f*****g brilliant, which makes him the 2023 poster boy for the Dunning-Kruger Effect.
It’s not a stretch to believe that Sen. Tuberville is dumber than your average post-turtle.
At this point is there any other explanation for Alabama GOP Senator Tommy Tuberville’s continued crybaby tantrum crusade against the military? (Aside from how Tuberville is the dumbest [#$@%*&!] to escape a football field and become a United States senator.) Is it now reasonable to conclude that he must just really hate American troops as much as his slobbering superhero Donald Trump does?
We’ve reached week one-million-and-five of Tuberville’s petulant little bitchfit holding up Senate confirmations of people across the entire military, and just fucking the troops, the military and our national security in the process, because the moron is upset about the Pentagon’s abortion policy, which helps provide for troops and their family members who need abortions. (It was of course enacted because the illegitimate partisan hack Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade and confiscated Americans’ bodily autonomy and gave it to Samuel Alito to rub all over himself.)
Yes, Sen. Tuberville has made his point…and then some. And he’s still fighting his phony little battle all by himself. He’s managed thoroughly booger up the military’s senior management structure and quite possibly damage America’s military readiness.
Nice work, Comrade….
Sen. “No One’s More Military Than Me!” Tuberville believes that he’s on the right side of history, though virtually every other Senator, regardless of party, would, given the opportunity, have happily shoved him head-first down a flight of marble stairs.
Not that the Senator has ever served a day, but he certainly knows what’s “wrong” with America’s military today. It’s infested with “woke.”
Again, we do have to allow for the likelihood that Tuberville, this hick who likes to be called “Coach,” this rancidly underqualified PE major, really is as [#$@%*&!] stupid as he looks. Otherwise why would he keep doubling down, even after being informed so many times by so many humans better and smarter than him that he’s hurting the military and our national security?
Tuberville did a Newsmax interview last night, and boy, did he say some awful things about the military and about the troops. He’s a MAGA Republican halfwit, so he’s been brainwashed into thinking the military is now “woke,” and therefore weak.
Among what he’s referring to as “woke” are efforts within the military to increase diversity and inclusion education. There’s long been an effort to make this country’s armed forces look more like the country it defends and less like the White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexual-majority institution Sen. Cornpone Q. Chickenshit is trying to preserve.
Sen. “No One’s More Military Than Me!” Tuberville’s virulent racism is well-known, and he sees no reason it shouldn’t remain the White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexual-majority institution it’s long been. After all, spending money on diversity training is money that can’t be spent on weapons and killing Brown people.
Tuberville strummed his cornpone banjo whining about the military wanting to spend $114 million on diversity training, because Alabama Republicans don’t like that sort of thing. Then he said that “we’ve got the weakest military that we’ve had probably here in my lifetime.” He allowed that there were good military people — mighty big of him — but said that “infiltrating the military is all this wokeness.”
As if this chickenshit is in any position to know one way or the other.
He blamed Joe Biden, Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin and former Joint Chiefs Chairman Mark Milley for this alleged woke infiltration. He of course failed to show any of his work explaining what he thinks those three men have done to bring about this turn of events.
He surely didn’t show how they’ve done anything worse than his own enemy-comforting traitor…war on the troops.
“[A]ll this wokeness?” What Sen. Cornpone Q. Chickenshit referred to as “wokeness,” is merely the American military adapting to the realities of today’s world. It’s a world that no longer belongs to or is ruled by White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexuals.
Despite his crude, primitive efforts, Sen. “No One’s More Military Than Me!” Tuberville won’t be able to turn back the clock. He’s fighting a battle that not even members of his own party want to be associated with. This is not his father’s military, where White Made Right. It’s an organization that looks like America and sincerely tries to recruit all races, religions, and genders. The skills needed to defend America today are no longer exclusive to White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexuals.
“Wokeness” isn’t a problem in today’s American military. The issue is ignorant dinosaurs like Sen. Tuberville, who believe that America should be like it once was. That time is long gone, as is the country that the Senator hearkens back to.
“It’s gettin’ to be, not a laughin’ matter, it’s to the point now where you’re goin’, ‘What else can they do to hurt our country?’ And they’re intentionally doin’ it.”
Ayup. It is indeed not a laughin’ matter, and all the better and smarter people are wonderin’ that exact thing about Tommy Tuberville.
And he’s intentionally doin’ it.
Combined with how eager Tuberville is to translate Vladimir Putin’s foreign policy positions into Country Fried Dumbfuck, it’s enough to make folks wonder about this Tuberville character.
Do you mean America’s Dumbest Senator? The poster child for the Dunning-Kruger Effect? The man who believes women should rightly be the property of men and whose place shouldn’t be in the military but in the kitchen?
Yeah, that troglodytic maroon who’d struggle to spell “cat” if you spotted him the “c” and the “a.”
A reasonable person might reasonably wonder why Sen. Cornpone Q. Chickenshit is so openly aiding America’s adversaries, most notably Vladimir Putin? And is his plan to keep high-level military positions open for Donald Trump to fill with loyalists who will make nice with Putin?
Just who is it that’s weakening America? Because Sen. Tuberville certainly looks like Donald Trump’s (and Vladimir Putin’s) useful idiot (emphasis on “idiot”).
It’s been said (often by me) that a little bit of knowledge can be dangerous. Few illustrate the truth of this maxim more than America’s Dumbest Senator, Sen. “No One’s More Military Than Me!” Tuberville.
I’ll leave you with the words of the Republican Bard, former Vice President Dan Quayle:
“A mind is a terrible thing.”
Yes, it most certainly is.
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Glommy Gubershill thinks being a football coach makes him fucking Sun Tzu.