BTW, "family values Republican" doesn't mean "sleeping with someone who isn't your spouse"
Dipping your pen in the wrong inkwell is one thing, being a hypocrite about it is quite another
“Don’t do anything stupid."
"Don’t worry," I whispered over the line, "I’m an expert on stupid."
"You’re..."
"Like, I can spot stupidity, because I know it so well. The way an exterminator knows bugs really well, and can spot where they’ve been? I’m like that. A stupidinator."
"Never say that word again," Prof said.”
Brandon Sanderson, Firefight
No one is is sure of his premise as the man who knows too little.
Barbara W. Tuchman, The March of Folly
When last I checked, adultery was still one of the Seven Deadly Sins (if you’re a Christian). I try hard not to judge people for what goes on (or doesn’t) within the confines of their marriage. After all, the only two people who truly understand the inner workings of a marriage are the two people involved. Anyone on the outside is merely engaged in conjecture.
That said, adultery, to most folks, is kind of a BFD- like a deal-breaker sort of BFD, if you know what I mean. That explains why those involved in extramarital sexual affairs usually skulk around, hoping to keep things on the down-low.
My feelings on adultery aren’t important because I’m here to discuss the too often predominantly Republican sin of hypocrisy- “Don’t judge me on what I do. Pay attention to what I say.”
Have you heard the one about the Family Values Republican who is getting divorced because he (allegedly) cheated on his wife all over the place? Of course you have! And if it wasn’t Rep. Jeff Duncan of South Carolina, whose wife, Melody Duncan, is divorcing him over his ongoing affair with DC Lobbyist Liz Williams, it was someone else.
“As a life-long social conservative, I am a strong advocate for life and traditional family values,” Duncan’s campaign page reads. “The most basic component of our society is the family. Now more than ever, it is imperative that we protect the values that America was founded upon and have made our country great. I am a proud member of the Values Action Team because of my desire to protect family values.”
Duncan, a member of the Now-Too-Wacky-For-Marjorie-Taylor-Green Freedom Caucus, then goes on to talk about how very much he hates abortion. Because of the “family values.”
Ah, yes…”family values”- that extraordinary set of Conservative values that reside in that Shining City on the Hill, yet no one ever seems to define them. Sure, there’s the always essential nuclear family- Dad, Mom, 2.5 kids, beautiful suburban home, white picket fence, well-stocked liquor cabinet, a boatload of unspoken grievances…and probably a dog or two.
The problem is that “family values” represent little more than a Potemkin village. It looks good from the outside, but there’s nothing behind it…because it’s only intended to be superficial.
But what ARE “family values,” save for a way for Republicans to present themselves as holier-than-thou and upholders of virtues they have no intention of upholding…except in public?
So while Jeff Duncan may face forward as a “life-long social conservative…a strong advocate for life and traditional family values,” he was also schtupping a woman in D.C. who was most definitely NOT his wife. And it seems he wasn’t making a herculean effort to keep his wandering affections (and his Johnson) a secret.
Melody Duncan’s divorce filing deliciously calls out her husband for his affair and hypocrisy. It was a beautiful thing.
Defendant is a public figure, having served for thirteen (13) years as a United States Representative in Congress for the Third (3d) District of South Carolina. Defendant has run for election, along with the support of his wife and sons, on a platform of family values.
Defendant recently left the marriage and has admitted to Plaintiff that he has an ongoing sexual relationship with a woman named Liz Williams. Additionally, Defendant has admitted this adulterous relationship to many other people, including the parties' sons and members of his staff.
As recently as August 28, 2023, Defendant hosted a "Faith and Freedom BBQ" where he spoke to the crowd, among other things, about his marriage to Plaintiff (calling her a supportive and loving wife and portraying an image of himself as a dedicated, dutiful husband. Upon information and belief, Defendant then left the next day and went directly to the home of his paramour, Liz Williams, in the Washington, D.C. area, where Plaintiff is informed and believes he continues to reside. Plaintiff is informed and believes that Defendant's extramarital relationship(s) is/are widely known in political circles of South Carolina and Washington D.C.
And it seems that Ms. Williams wasn’t Rep. Duncan’s only dalliance, which she also mentions in her divorce filing.
Melody Duncan has been told by others that there has been at least one affair other than the one with Williams. She is requesting a complete and final divorce immediately, “based upon the statutory grounds of adultery.” In South Carolina, a no-fault divorce requires a trial separation of at least one year, and Melody Duncan, clearly, is ready to throw the whole man out right now.
I understand how the “Faith and Freedom BBQ” thing may have been rather vomit-inducing for Mrs. Duncan. Listening to her soon-to-be ex-husband portray himself as “a dedicated, dutiful husband” couldn’t have been easy. Then again, Rep. Duncan is just another Republican playing a role that Conservative voters expect of a faithful, Christian, “family values” Republican.
[You may excuse yourself to vomit if you feel the need.]
It’s a charade, of course. Jeff Duncan is just one in a long line of powerful men guilty of thinking with the wrong head. He’s certainly not the first nor the last to have been caught dipping his pen in the wrong inkwell. Nor is his hypocrisy particularly noteworthy; it’s something men in power have been doing since they discovered that f*****g is fun, especially with women who aren’t their spouses.
Women gravitating toward married men possessed of money and/or power is practically a biological imperative. In Washington, it’s almost a feeding frenzy. The problem, of course, is keeping news of one’s extracurricular activities from getting back home to your district or, even worse, your spouse.
I don’t want to make it sound like I or anyone else should consider themselves qualified to sit in judgment of Rep. Duncan. If you’re a Penis-American, you’ve almost certainly thought with the wrong head more than a time or six. We’re guys; we do stupid shit to get laid. It happens, ‘kay? That doesn’t necessarily mean we’ve stepped outside our marriages, just that we might have engaged in a surfeit of borderline regrettable activities before settling down.
All adultery does is reveal who a person is. Temptation is out there for married people; the answer lies in how one deals with that temptation.
I don’t care if Rep. Duncan buggers Nepali mountain goats to stay in shape; whatever gets you through the night, ‘kay? No, what concerns me is his shameless hypocrisy- presenting himself as a “family values” Conservative even as he’s schtupping at least one woman who’s not his wife. His stamina is exceeded only by his hypocrisy.
Do what you wish to and/or with whom you want to. Don’t pretend to be something you’re not…especially if you’re pretending to be a holier-than-thou “family values” Conservative Christian.
And if you do get busted for being a liar, hypocrite, and for “hiking the Appalachian Trail,” take your medicine without whining like a bitch. Rep. Duncan already looks pathetic enough without making excuses.
Next time, though, can we remember that “Family Values Republican” doesn’t mean “cheating on your wife?”
Thank you. That will be all for now.
(All of my posts are now public. Any reader financial support will be considered pledges- support that’s greatly appreciated but not required to get to all of my work. I’ll leave it to my readers to determine if my work is worthy of their monetary support and at what level. To those who do offer their support, thank you. It means more than you know.)
Defined for us, “Sure, there’s the always essential nuclear family- Dad, Mom, 2.5 kids, beautiful suburban home, white picket fence, well-stocked liquor cabinet, a boatload of unspoken grievances…and probably a dog or two.” Thank you!