Donald von Shitzinpantz- A fragrant love story

"Real men wear diapers?" Seriously? WTF is wrong with MAGA?

(This is what MAGA Nation has sunk to? This barrel has no bottom. Courtesy

Jeff Tiedrich

)

Yes, it was another week in the Stupidverse. And not just any run-of-the-mill week, mind you. No, the waters from the melting snow on Mt. Stupid were running especially fast and cold now that Spring is fully upon us.

And just when I thought I’d make it through life without having cause or reason to use the phrase “Rise of the Turd Reich," well, here’s your sign. Yes, AmeriKKKa, just when you’d thought there was NO way this country could sink any lower or allegedly lucid humanoids could prove themselves less worthy of the right to vote…well, I’m just fucking gobsmacked.

Real men wear diapers? In case you might be wondering, this is NOT parody or satire. These cementheads are pretty serious, and they’ve somehow convinced themselves that they’re “owning the Libs” on this one.

Hell, isn’t EVERYTHING about owning the Libs for MAGAnauts?

MAGA, can we talk?

if your slavish devotion to an 88-count felony factory who shits his own pants has reached the level where you’re wearing adult diapers outside of your clothes, in public, guess what: you’re in a fucking cult.

get help.

Well, duh….

There can be no rational explanation for this sort of fuckery:

Aw, isn’t it cute how Dad’s looking at his son with such pride? Yep, they’re raising them up right, eh? It’s never too early to teach a child to be stupid in public.

But how do you explain this proud public dumbassitude from these smiling jackasses, who, insofar as I can tell, appear to be adults?

And then there’s this maroon. We should fervently hope that she doesn’t regularly hold the lives of large numbers of people in her hands.

Stop the plane! I want to get off!! Now!! No, I don’t care that we’re over the Sea of Japan. I don’t want to trust my life to pilot who’s a brain-dead troll!!

Yeah, she’s a real keeper, eh??

I don’t like to focus on the obvious stupidity and minimal mental capacity of some folks, but these mental and moral midgets make it impossible to do anything else. When you lead with your epic inability to discern the absurd from the serious, you’re a liability- to yourself, your family, and your country. That you’re planning on voting is a travesty because you’re too addled and brain-dead to understand what the fuck you’re getting yourself into.

Sadly, the “Real Men Wear Diapers” phenomenon appears to be a real thing. MAGAnauts exercising common sense and simple adult decency? Not so much.

So, how ‘bout you tell me you’re in a cult without telling me you’re in a cult?

Does it truly matter whether or not Agolf Shitler wears adult diapers? Eh, probably not. There are many other, far more legitimate reasons to despise the gaseous asshole. The adult diaper question is just another shitty question about a shitty person who has no business sitting in the big chair behind the Resolute desk in the Oval Office.

What I find distressing about this episode is that so many of his supporters have seemed to embrace the adult diaper question with such fervor. This is true even though you know that if Joe Biden were rumored to be wearing adult diapers, these same mental and moral midgets wouldn’t be sparing the ridicule. The fart and diaper jokes would be spreading on Truth Social like, well, like a social disease.

Yeah, WHAT double standard, eh?

It’s as silly and stupid as it is hypocritical, but such is the nature of Indecision 2024. Hypocrisy is the rule, not the exception, particularly in MAGAnation.

But at least one person has managed to maintain some perspective as the Sturm und Drang swirls around us:

The funniest aspect of this was when Michael Cohen's tweet referring to Donald Trump as “Donald von Shitzinpantz” was read in open court. Besides being a new low in the history of Presidential politics, it had to be hugely embarrassing for Trump, who had to sit through that without reacting.

And the fun might be just beginning.

Allow me to offer, courtesy of the kind and benevolent

Jeff Tiedrich

, CNN’s Jake Tapper struggling to keep his professional demeanor intact as he relays the news of Cohen’s tweet being read in open court.

He’s a better man than I am, Charlie Brown. I couldn’t have done it with a straight face.

OMG, I LOVE a good circus. Don’t you? They’re not my circus OR my monkeys, but, damn, this is hilarious.

It may be true that no man is above the law, but Donny Diaperful can soil it like no one in this life or the next. He’s somehow been able to turn our judicial system into the legal equivalent of a three-ring circus. It doesn’t hurt that he has the Supreme Court wrapped around his finger and primed to do his bidding. Still, he has other Trump-adjacent appointees spread across the federal judiciary who are ready, willing, and able to carry his water.

So, while he’s facing 88 felony counts in various federal and state courts, it will take something of a miracle for him to be convicted and to have that conviction stick before Election Day. With the 2024 election just six months away, the window of accountability is closing, and time isn’t on the side of justice. Lord Stumblefuck knows this, and he’s masterfully playing the “delay, delay, delay” game.

This madness brings me back around to the adult diaper issue. On the one hand, who cares if the man wears diapers? If he has incontinence issues, that’s unfortunate for him and everyone around him. The “real men wear diapers” shtick is as silly as it is hypocritical, though, because if the tables were turned and Joe Biden was the one wearing the diapers, the ridicule emanating from MAGAnation would be relentless and brutal.

On the other hand, all of this silliness serves to indicate just how MAGAts will believe just about anything, as well as do anything to rationalize anything potentially negative about their hero. He could be flying a Nazi battle flag from his limousine as he buggers a goat in the back seat, and they’d be lauding him for showing strength and standing up for the White race.

Stupid is as stupid does, yeah?

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