Remember, Republicans- It's Your Duty To Vote For Shitty Candidates
Ah, the soft bigotry of low expectations
If there’s one recurring theme with Republican candidates this fall, it’s their stunningly low quality. Between the election deniers, militia members, MAGA chuds, liars, philanderers, and hypocrites, it’s hard to sort the losers from the few who might have potential. It’s as if the GOP tossed whatever standards they may once have had aside and threw open the doors. If you’re drawing breath, lean to the right, and believe Donald Trump is the rightful President, you’re in.
Is there a line on the GOP candidate questionnaire that says, “Do you have a pulse?” Or one that says, “Do you have multiple children out of wedlock with several different women?” Or how about, “Have you had multiple extramarital affairs and paid for one or more abortions- even though you’re running on an anti-abortion platform?” Or perhaps even, “Do you believe that Donald Trump should be declared the winner of the 2020 Presidential election and Joe Biden frog-marched to the Rose Garden and executed for treason?”
Well, Conservative talking head Liz Wheeler feels your pain…to a point.
It does suck to have to vote for, excuse my French, shitty candidates. It does. That is where, right there, that's where the left would like us to stop. And they'd like conservatives to look at these allegations and say, "Listen, this man, Herschel Walker, is living his life in a way we do not support therefore we will not vote for him." But that, my friends, is not even kind of the whole story. And if we stop right there, then we are doing a disservice to our country.
Yeah, it’s got to suck donkey balls when your political party can’t come up with decent, lucid bipeds to run for public office. What, there wasn’t enough Thorazine to go around?
Then again, if you look at Republican candidates from Murrieta to Bangor and Everett to Key West, what you have is a collection of misfits. It’s a motley amalgamation of election deniers, Christian Nationalists, and losers who’d combine two and two and insist the correct answer is five- because their Bibles tell them so.
Most of those carrying the GOP banner this election cycle shouldn’t be trusted to lead a pack of hungry Cub Scouts to a Jack-in-the-Box, much less to make legislative decisions regarding America’s future. And yet there are “patriots” who will vote for them for the sole reason that they have an “R” behind their name.
Here’s a shining example of the GOP’s dilemma:
How shitty has Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) been at her job over the past two years? So bad that her home state newspaper, the Denver Post, is pleading with voters in Boebert’s district not to vote for her.
We beg voters in western and southern Colorado not to give Rep. Lauren Boebert their vote.
Boebert has not represented the 3rd Congressional District well. Almost exclusively, she has spent her time and efforts contributing to the toxic political environment in this nation.
The good people in this district are not angry and abrasive; they are not hateful and caustic; they do not boast of their own prowess or sling insults as entertainment. The ranchers we know working the Uncompaghre Plateau, the teachers in Durango, the steel mill workers in Pueblo, and the farmers setting down roots in the San Louis Valley keep to themselves, watch their families grow, and pray for better days.
Boebert’s unproductive approach, combined with the efforts of others, has helped erode Congress’ ability to honestly debate public policy that could help people in her district.
The sad thing is that the Post’s editorial board is spot-on. Boebert is abrasive, combative, caustic, hateful, and dumb as a post turtle. She freely brags about her non-existent accomplishments, hands out insults like they’re Halloween candy, and is utterly incapable of honestly debating public policy.
That’s because she doesn’t know the first thing about how government works. She doesn’t understand the Constitution, the inner workings of government, how to make common cause, how to forge coalitions with other lawmakers- in short, how to do anything she needs to carry out the duties of her job.
Boebert…is unable or perhaps unwilling to articulate any policy nuance on the extraction of oil and gas owned by taxpayers from our public lands. She has opposed every effort to protect public lands in the district and failed to disclose in a timely manner that her husband made almost $1 million as a consultant for the largest drilling company in the 3rd Congressional District’s Piceance Basin.
Rather than talk about these issues, Boebert slings mud.
Her performance at the Club 20 debate…was odd, to say the least, and she spent a good chunk of her speaking time talking about Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and criticizing the moderator.
In her primary, Boebert called a man born and raised in Montrose County a groomer – a term for a gay man who sexually abuses children. The remark, directed at Don Coram, a conservative Republican and rancher whose son happens to be gay, is just one example of Boebert’s casual yet crass cruelty, which she puts on display on a daily basis while in Washington, D.C.
Boebert’s “casual yet crass cruelty” is all she has to offer. She’s not intelligent enough to be able to speak on issues of importance with any degree of knowledge or authority. Does she see being in Congress as a game? Does she lack the maturity to recognize the importance of the position to which her constituents elected her?
Or does she see it as an opportunity to enrich herself and her husband- “her husband made almost $1 million as a consultant for the largest drilling company in the 3rd Congressional District’s Piceance Basin.”
Is she laughing all the way to the bank?
Boebert’s campaign has featured numerous ads with unfounded accusations against her opponent, Adam Frisch. To his credit, Frisch has not reciprocated and has chosen to take the high road, not an easy thing to do against the Queen of Mean.
The closest Frisch has gotten to slinging mud in the campaign is accusing Boebert of having ties to a far-right militia group known as the “three percenters.”
Boebert has made no secret of the fact that she embraces the group’s support of her campaign, taking smiling photos with members clad in tactical gear, tweeting encouragement for events and rallies tied to members of the group. She tweeted out “I am the militia,” on June 14, 2020.
The group draws its names from the fable that only 3% of the population of the original colonies fought in the Revolutionary War and the misguided belief that this country is headed for another fight for liberation for which they must prepare to fight – often amassing weapons caches and making bombs.
Members of the group have been implicated in several violent plots – a planned bombing of a mosque in Minnesota, an FBI-foiled bombing attempt of a bank in Oklahoma, and the kidnapping plot of Michigan’s governor. And, of course, the Jan. 6, 2020, attempt to storm the U.S. Capitol and prevent Congress from seating the duly elected next president of the United States.
On Jan. 6, Boebert tweeted out: “Today is 1776.” Was it a reference to the signing of the Declaration of Independence on July 4 of that year and the hope for a peaceful transfer of power under the laws and requirements of the Constitution written in 1787, or was it a reference to the bloodshed of the Revolutionary War and hope that an attack on the Capitol could bring in a new form of government for this nation? We don’t like that we have serious doubts it was the former.
Boebert is also alleged to have given personal tours of the US Capitol in the days prior to January 6th to some of those involved in the insurrection. This accusation has yet to be substantiated, but that it can even be made is unsurprising for the Congresswoman from Colorado’s 3rd District. She’s a loose cannon and prone to violating her Oath of Office.
That the Denver Post feels so strongly about Lauren Boebert’s ineptitude and unfitness for office that it’s BEGGING voters not to give her their support is telling. An editorial board, even if they don’t support a candidate, will typically couch their lack of support in softer words. However, begging the voters of Colorado’s 3rd Congressional district to vote for Adam Frisch shows just how far Lauren Boebert has fallen. It also shows just how unfit for the job Boebert is- as if the last two years haven’t amply demonstrated that sad reality.
And Boebert is but one of the Murderer’s Row of “Biggest Losers” that the GOP has assembled this election cycle. Herschel Walker? Kari Lake? Doug Mastriano? Seriously?? And I’m just getting started on that list. Most of these maroons shouldn’t be running for 7th grade Treasurer, much less for public offices of actual significance.
Be afwaid, America. Be vewy, vewy afwaid. This silliness is what passes for democracy in America today.
