The 2023 North Stars and Cowboy Bars Christian Parents of the Year

There's no hatred and abuse quite like Christian love and tolerance

Dan and Jennifer Mead

Don’t be an asshole. Just because you have one, it doesn’t mean it’s okay to act like it.

• Christian Simamora, Marry Now, Sorry Later

Always think deep inside and listen to your gut about someone that “loves” you. If you wonder if they should be treating you that way you know the answer.

• Tracy Malone

I’ve never had children, but I can’t imagine having a child and not wanting to do everything possible to make the world the best and safest place I could for them. If that meant going without cars, clothes, vacations, or outings to fancy restaurants, it’s difficult to conceive of not being willing to do that. I’d want my child to grow into a better experience and world than I had, and I’d like to think I’d do everything in my power to make that happen.

Why have children if you’re not willing to do right by them and if you’re not going to love them with your heart and soul? If you’re going to treat a child like an extension of yourself, like property instead of as a unique individual, why bother? You’ll almost certainly make yourself miserable and, even worse, ruin a perfectly good child.

With that lovely introduction, say hello to the 2023 North Stars and Coffee Bars Christian Parents of the Year: Dan and Jennifer Mead.

Both of these cretins should be immediately and permanently sterilized. Seriously.

Two awful Christian parents are suing a public school district for looking out for the best interests of their child after they made it clear they weren’t interested in the same goal.

Dan and Jennifer Mead have a transgender son. The child didn’t feel comfortable admitting this to them, so he told his teachers and counselors at East Rockford Middle School in Michigan instead. In 2022, the child specifically requested that they refer to him using masculine pronouns, which the adults at the school did. The Rockford Public School District didn’t have any policy requiring school officials to “out” kids against their will, so no one told the Meads about this.

Months later, the Meads discovered what was going on after an email they received accidentally used their son’s name (instead of the one he was assigned at birth), and they pulled their son from the school district.

‘Cuz it’s what Jesus would do, don’tchaknow?

Yes, these two paragons of Christian love and charity are genuinely, profoundly horrible people, and they’re suing the Rockford Public School District for not “outing” their transgender son against his will.

And you wonder why he didn’t want to be outed….

Yeah, they’re smiling…probably because they think being “Christian” makes them morally superior and “better” humanoids than you or me.

Now, with the help of conservative legal group Alliance Defending Freedom, the Christians are suing the district for protecting their child.

Or, as ADF describes it (all while misgendering the kid):

By deliberately hiding important information from the Meads about their daughter, the school district violated their parental rights. Parents have the fundamental right to direct the upbringing, education, and health care of their children, and government officials have no right to hide critical information from them.

The entire lawsuit is a giant admission that these parents are failures. If your son or daughter doesn’t feel safe trusting you with information that consequential, there’s probably a good reason for that.

Despite ADF’s contention in their lawsuit, the school district didn’t “hide important information” from the Meads. The school has no policy nor legal responsibility to “out” children to their parents for the simple reason that some parents will react much as the Meads have, possibly placing their children at considerable risk.

The school’s primary responsibility is to educate children, followed closely by protecting them. If they’re not required by state law to disclose gender identity to parents, which schools in Michigan aren’t, they’re certainly under no moral or ethical obligation to do so.

Judging by the Meads’ response, that seems like it might be a good thing.

The district has a legal obligation to help the children, not put their lives in danger by outing them to their parents against their will. In some cases, that could lead to abuse at home. It could mean the kid has to go through conversion torture. It could mean getting kicked out of the house. Going by a different name or pronoun is also not the sort of thing counselors should have to run by parents for approval. If that’s what the kid wants and it improves their mental well-being and ability to function in school, fantastic. (Keep in mind the Meads’ child may have told the counselors why he didn’t feel comfortable sharing this with his parents but we’re not privy to that information.)

Of course, we don’t know the situation within the Meads’ home. There may have been a legitimate reason why their transgender son didn’t want his parents to learn that he’d requested to be referred to by masculine pronouns. And it may have been an intensely uncomfortable situation at home for the child.

Judging by his parents’ reaction, the school’s maintaining the son’s confidence makes sense. If it means protecting the child from potential abuse at home or from possibly being subject to “conversion therapy” or worse, the child would be within his rights to want that information withheld from his parents.

Tomorrow on “People Unclear on the Concept”….

Children aren’t parents' property; they don’t “own” them. Not everything that happens or could potentially happen to them should or must run through the parents. Certainly, the parents have a legitimate interest in the safety and well-being of their child, but any child deserves a certain amount of space to operate independently. Not every decision they make or action they take needs or should have the approval of a parent or guardian.

How horrible were the counselors at the school? The Meads provide examples in their lawsuit. Just consider this email that one social worker sent to colleagues asking if they would let the Meads’ son (whose name begins with the letter F) eat lunch in the library instead of the cafeteria:

F[] is another person we should add to the library lunch option. He said he would sometimes like to have a quieter environment to eat and he knows [other student name redacted in original] who would be in lunch with him.

Erin, F[] might be stopping by to see you today. He tried earlier and the office was locked which is how he ended up in my office. He’s a super cool kid-I really enjoyed my time with him. He’s very self aware!

Dawn

Here’s another email that same social worker sent to the student’s math teacher:

I met with F[] [Mead] today and he said he’s struggling to understand math and feels “stupid” in it. I told him you’re a great person to talk to about extra help. I also suggested he could come to Rob’s room prior to school starting which would be a quiet space to work and with Rob’s math knowledge, he’d be a great resource.

Thanks,

Dawn

OMG…those education NAZIS!!! How DARE they treat a child with such kindness and compassion when they should be kicking his sorry ass up and down the hallway?

Come on…people were calling their son by his preferred name…and being kind and compassionate to him…and looking out for his well-being…and doing the things that caring, committed teachers do.

What to get the asshole Christian in your life for Christmas

These are the things that ADF and the Meads are upset about. It’s like they expected the school district to hate and persecute their son for being the sort of person they’d hate and persecute.

Remember that the Jesus Christ they claim to revere preached things like love, tolerance, kindness, acceptance, and inclusion. None of these are qualities the Meads appear to have incorporated into their lives or black hearts.

Yes,

[C]onservative Christians hate it when other people show compassion to the people Jesus taught them to hate.

At no point in the lawsuit (or the ADF’s press release) do the Meads explain why their son might not have told them he was trans. They never really grapple with having a trans kid. Nor do they offer any sympathy for the educators who did everything in their power to make school a safe space for their son. They definitely don’t explain why their kid will be better off being home-schooled now that they’ve withdrawn their son from the public schools.

They don’t have to explain any of this in the lawsuit, but they’re so hell-bent on going after the school district, they repeatedly reveal their own internal monstrosity. The same can be said for the morally bankrupt attorneys at ADF representing them.

The Meads go on to blame the adults in the district for attempting to “socially transition” their child, as if the school’s goal was to make the child transgender. The Meads claim school officials “who lack appropriate training are not qualified to diagnose gender dysphoria,” though that’s not what happened either.

The Meads would seem to lack" appropriate training” and are also “not qualified to diagnose gender dysphoria,” which, for those of us in the cheap seats, is

Gender dysphoria is a condition where there is significant discomfort or distress caused by incongruence between one's assigned gender at birth and their gender identity. In simpler terms, it's the emotional and psychological distress that can arise when a person's internal sense of gender doesn't align with the sex they were assigned at birth. This condition is recognized by mental health professionals, and support may include counseling, hormone therapy, or gender-affirming surgeries.

Of course, NONE of this has anything to do with the person at the center of this controversy, the Meads’ transgender son. Shouldn’t his well-being be top-of-mind for everyone- especially his parents?

And yet Dan and Jennifer Mead are far more concerned that the school district has “withheld” information about their property progeny that the district was under no obligation to provide them.

Hemant Mehta summed it up beautifully:

The reality is that school officials simply accommodated a request from a student who wasn’t asking for much, and now these bigots are coming after them for violating their supposed constitutional right to be shitty parents.

That’s really what this comes down to. The Meads are far less concerned about their son's well-being than they are about maintaining complete and total control over him.

I don’t know their child’s name, but I genuinely feel sorry for him. As if dealing with the difficulties of growing up transgender and having to deal with the associated issues isn’t difficult enough, he has assholes for parents. Worse, he has White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexual assholes for parents…and who knows what a couple so self-righteous and intolerant might be capable of.

Good Lord, y’all. Be a Christian if that’s what gets you through the night. Love Jesus. Go to church. Sacrifice a virgin if it makes you feel righteous and holy. But NONE of that gives you the right to be an asshole to others, PARTICULARLY those you bring into this world and commit to shepherding into adulthood.

I have nothing against Christians…at least those who commit to living their faith. But, man, do I harbor an enduring animus towards assholes who call themselves “Christians,” and that holds doubly true for “Christian” assholes who are also parents.

If you can’t live a Christ-like life and model Christ-like qualities toward a child, why bother to call yourself a Christian? You’re missing the point entirely.

Or perhaps you enjoy modeling hypocrisy for your children?

(All of my posts are now public. Any reader financial support will be considered pledges- support that’s greatly appreciated but not required to get to all of my work. I’ll trust my readers to determine if my work is worthy of their financial support and at what level. To those who do offer their support, thank you. It means more than you know.)