The More You Know.... Black people and DEI are responsible for ALL of our problems!
Including drug-addled employees (Black, of course) and COVID lockdowns
These days, it seems that any time there’s a major fuck-up in the system, the Right-wing cognoscenti leaps into the fray to blame DEI. And what is DEI, you may ask? That’s an excellent question, and I’m glad you asked.
Of course, whenever I’m in doubt about a concept, I go to the source of all knowledge and wisdom on da Interwebz. I’m speaking, of course, of Wikipedia, which is to the intelligentsia what the Bible is to Christians. And, at least according to my unimpeachable source of wisdom and knowledge, DEI is explained like this:
Diversity, equity, and inclusion (usually abbreviated DEI) are organizational frameworks which seek to promote "the fair treatment and full participation of all people", particularly groups "who have historically been underrepresented or subject to discrimination" on the basis of identity or disability.
You’ll note that this definition has nothing to do with engineering, navigation, space exploration, food science, free throw shooting, or any other scientific or quasi-scientific pursuit. I offer this disclaimer because DEI is not a catch-all cause of everything that’s wrong with America.
Unless, of course, you’re a good, God-fearing White Conservative Christian Cisgender Heterosexual who believe this is a White world and Jesus is a White American (and, naturally, a Republican).
As
, my favorite profane authority on all things insanely fucking stupid on the Far-Right, was kind enough to offer up, “no, racists, the Frances Scott Key Bridge didn’t collapse because of “diversity;” shut the fuck up.”two months ago, when Boeing airplanes began disintegrating mid-flight, the stupidest fucking idiots in America immediately identified the cause: black people.
I shit you not. Laura Ingraham blamed it on diversity. so did Cokey McSniffles Junior. misshapen gnome Ben Shapiro announced that he wouldn’t fly with any airline that hired black pilots. even the Space Nazi couldn’t keep his ignorant mouth shut.
well, guess what: America’s top racists are racisting again.
NO!! I am shocked that racism is occurring in America…AGAIN!! Who coulda seen THAT coming from a mile away??
a cargo ship in distress struck Baltimore’s Francis Scott Key Bridge, causing it to collapse — and once again, the usual gang of dipshits know exactly why it happened.
Fox News found object Maria Bartiromo blamed the tragedy on Joe Biden’s “wide open border” — because of course she did.
Wait…a fully loaded container ship loses power, and the steering goes on the fritz, perhaps causing it to careen into one of the bridge’s supports. Then the bridge collapses like it was made of so many matchsticks…and it’s Joe Biden’s fault? Because of the President’s “wide open border?”
Why not blame Colin Kaepernick taking a knee? Or Megan Rapinoe for being a lesbian? Or me for neglecting to take out the garbage last night (so that’s why the house smelled like fish this morning)?
Well, yeah, ya gotta blame someone….
I want to smoke what Maria Bartiromo’s been smoking. Wait, on second thought, scratch that. I value what few remaining brain cells have stuck with me.
WTF does a cargo ship taking down a bridge in Baltimore Harbor have to do with our southern border?
Go ahead, I’ll wait….
Oh, never mind…I’ll answer the question- there IS no connection between the two. It’s just another cheap attempt by two partisan nitwits dedicated to doing anything within their feeble power to tar and smear President Biden.
If someone told them that breathable air was Joe Biden’s fault, Bartiromo and Sen. Scott would hold their breath until they passed out. Or, with any luck, they’d tie plastic bags around their heads with rubber bands and suffocate themselves to death.
The world would be a far better place for it….
Of course, Conservative horndog Matt Schlapp, who freely admits, "I'm no expert,” nonetheless blames the crash on “drug-addled employees and COVID lockdowns.”
Damn…nailed it, didn’t he? Not bad for not being an expert.
With all of the Conservative intellectual firepower focused on figuring out what happened at the Frances Scott Key Bridge, it’s a wonder the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) is still at the scene. I mean, the mystery’s been solved, yeah??
And, if nothing else, we certainly know who to focus our rage on because Brigitte Gabriel (who’s been blessed with the IQ and personality of a five-gallon bucket of generic vanilla ice cream) solved that, too:
Thankfully, this neutral observer was able to test Ms. Gabriel's theory and prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt. YAY, SCIENCE!!!
Indeed. Why, I ask for a concerned nation, is Secretary Pete Buttigieg still in his job?? We have significant evidence that he’s been a colossal failure, yet Joe Biden continues to allow Sec. Buttigieg to suck at the public teat, his incompetence front and center for all to see!!
DEI!!!
Then, as if to add the piece de resistance, the final nail in the coffin for the inept Biden fuck-ups Administration, come those two arbiters of all things calm, rational, and even-tempered.
Yes, I’m referring, of course, to the tandem of Laura “I don’t just LOOK like a sociopath” Loomer and Rep. Marjorie Trailer Greene (R-GA), Chairwoman of the Congressional Neanderthals for Jesus Caucus.
You could call Loomer a garbage human being and get no argument from me. I’d say you might be letting her off a bit easy, but then I think she’s a waste of a meat sack.
As is usually the case, MTG proceeds from the premise that it’s a terrorist attack until someone definitively proves to her that it isn’t…or at least until the voices in her skull stop screaming that it’s DEI, or maybe CRT. You can’t be too careful these days, right??
Even Alex Jones and that USDA prime, Grade-A specimen of male (in)humanity, Andrew Tate, went off the deep end:
“Looks deliberate to me,” Jones wrote. “A cyber-attack is probable. WW3 has already started.”
Jones’ comments came in response to a post by accused sex trafficker Andrew Tate, who also claimed that the “ship was cyber-attacked” to force it to crash into the bridge.
“Nothing is safe,” Tate commented. “Black Swan event imminent.”
Who knew Andrew Tate was an animal lover?
As Tiedrich is kind enough to point out (for those of us who may not have already figured this out, of course)- it’s generally not a good idea to get your news from accused sex traffickers or someone who revels in monetizing the pain of families who’ve lost children in mass shootings.
Talk about shit human beings….
of course it wasn’t all wall-to-wall racism from MAGA world. every crackpot under the sun used the crash as a pretext to air their own weird-ass grievances.
Fox & Friends — Fox’s romper-room-for-racists early morning chat show — demanded to know why Joe Biden was asleep at one-thirty in the morning. why can’t Joe go on all-night adderall benders like Former Fuck does?
Scarlet Dumb-Ass Nancy Mace blamed the crash on the infrastructure bill — please don’t ask me to explain the logic here — and whined that only 7,800 bridges had been repaired so far. why the fuck couldn’t Joe Biden have fixed 7,801?
Wouldn’t it be nice to hear some heartfelt sympathy and condolences expressed by some of the shit human beings who’ve decided to politicize the Frances Scott Key Bridge tragedy for their own benefit?
You’d think that some of these folks could, even if for a few minutes, drop their rancid partisanship and display a wee bit o’ humanity. It wouldn’t take long. It wouldn’t cost anything. It wouldn’t even be a sign of weakness or moral turpitude. Then again, in a world in which almost literally EVERYTHING is parsed for political significance and squeezed for every last ounce of political advantage, hoping that people could, even for a nanosecond, be a regular, compassionate human being seems a bridge too far.
Verily, sayeth the Lord, for the assholes shall always be among you….
All of my posts are public at this time. Any reader financial support will be greatly appreciated. There’s no paywall blocking access to my work (except for a few newsletters), but that remains an option down the road. I’ll trust my readers to determine if my work is worthy of their financial support and at what level. To those who do offer their support, thank you. It means more than you know.
One might also add that this particular ship has had steering problems in the past. As for undocumented migrant workers, the 6 who died on the bridge while fixing potholes were all just that. Taking the dangerous and thankless jobs that Americans refuse to do.