I was singled out for recreational humiliation in Jr. High, to the point that it tipped into a kind of sexual assault. So that's not something I've ever successfully walked away from. High school was different, and salvation for me was band (in all of its manifestations.) There were some big guys in that group, but they never hassled me at any time or place.
I've always been astonished at how cruel kids can be to one another, and I've never understood why junior high was a remake of "Lord of the Flies" for so many of us.
Jack, I, along with many, many others, also experienced exclusion and mostly social bullying for some adolescent years. It is amazing what minor, innocuous "differences" triggered our opponents' behaviors. My coping strategies included imagining where I and the bullies would be in 20 years. I imagined doing very well in school, getting a great, highly-paid job and one day driving a new sports car into a gas station and having my gas pumped by the attendant who was the bully. [I was around 12 then, so please pardon the explicit (yet unintended) economic snobbery - my family barely had 2 nickels to rub together at the time, so that informed my goals.] Eventually, reality and life caused any such retributive concerns to fade away, replaced by life's myriad other challenges and goals.
For many of us, the descent by supposed adults into adolescent middle school thought and behavior patterns and its gradual diffusion throughout the MAGA community of hate has been one of the more frustrating things about politics-writ-small over the past 2 decades. While the 90s saw the closet door opened, eventually widely, for those who were trapped inside by societal conformist pressures and the recognition that they would not be allowed simply to be who they genuinely are, the late second decade of the 20s saw the lid blown off the behavioral dungeon built in the 60s to confine and constrain the deep, dark, and persistently assertive cultural conformists (bigots) claiming authority to police and purify society, by force if necessary, of those who in any way do not look, act, or believe like them. Humanity created demons snd devils thousands of years ago to explain the existence of evil and tragedy in the world. I suspect that when mirrors were invented, the focus of the search for the essence and driving force of evil turned inward (appropriately). Humans are, by orders of magnitude, the singularly most destructive species on this planet, due largely to unrestrained greed and the willingness, if not eagerness to kill in the pursuit of wealth and power over others. The waxing and waning of the number of bullies around us is a good indicator of the success or failure of a community to control its more destructive, primal urges - as well as the efficiency of the attempt by so many of us to infuse the elements of healthy, respectful relationship models into our community. One can only hope that "the dark bottom" has been reached and the future is trending upward into the light (in this cycle). Brand me a cautiously optimistic realist.
I was singled out for recreational humiliation in Jr. High, to the point that it tipped into a kind of sexual assault. So that's not something I've ever successfully walked away from. High school was different, and salvation for me was band (in all of its manifestations.) There were some big guys in that group, but they never hassled me at any time or place.
I've always been astonished at how cruel kids can be to one another, and I've never understood why junior high was a remake of "Lord of the Flies" for so many of us.
Jack, I, along with many, many others, also experienced exclusion and mostly social bullying for some adolescent years. It is amazing what minor, innocuous "differences" triggered our opponents' behaviors. My coping strategies included imagining where I and the bullies would be in 20 years. I imagined doing very well in school, getting a great, highly-paid job and one day driving a new sports car into a gas station and having my gas pumped by the attendant who was the bully. [I was around 12 then, so please pardon the explicit (yet unintended) economic snobbery - my family barely had 2 nickels to rub together at the time, so that informed my goals.] Eventually, reality and life caused any such retributive concerns to fade away, replaced by life's myriad other challenges and goals.
For many of us, the descent by supposed adults into adolescent middle school thought and behavior patterns and its gradual diffusion throughout the MAGA community of hate has been one of the more frustrating things about politics-writ-small over the past 2 decades. While the 90s saw the closet door opened, eventually widely, for those who were trapped inside by societal conformist pressures and the recognition that they would not be allowed simply to be who they genuinely are, the late second decade of the 20s saw the lid blown off the behavioral dungeon built in the 60s to confine and constrain the deep, dark, and persistently assertive cultural conformists (bigots) claiming authority to police and purify society, by force if necessary, of those who in any way do not look, act, or believe like them. Humanity created demons snd devils thousands of years ago to explain the existence of evil and tragedy in the world. I suspect that when mirrors were invented, the focus of the search for the essence and driving force of evil turned inward (appropriately). Humans are, by orders of magnitude, the singularly most destructive species on this planet, due largely to unrestrained greed and the willingness, if not eagerness to kill in the pursuit of wealth and power over others. The waxing and waning of the number of bullies around us is a good indicator of the success or failure of a community to control its more destructive, primal urges - as well as the efficiency of the attempt by so many of us to infuse the elements of healthy, respectful relationship models into our community. One can only hope that "the dark bottom" has been reached and the future is trending upward into the light (in this cycle). Brand me a cautiously optimistic realist.
Yeah, I always pictured my bullies pumping gas and digging ditches. I wonder how that turned out?? 😊😝